Date Everything!: A Hilariously Unique Dating Sim

Date Everything! is a single-player dating simulation game that throws convention out the window. Forget the typical romantic interests; in this quirky title from Sassy Chap Games, your potential partners are the everyday objects surrounding you in the comfort of your own home. This isn’t your grandma’s dating sim – prepare for a whirlwind romance with your refrigerator, vacuum cleaner, bookshelf, and a whole host of other surprisingly charming inanimate objects.

A World of Dateable Objects

The premise is simple yet utterly captivating: a mysterious benefactor sends you a pair of magical glasses, dubbed “dateviators,” granting you the ability to see and interact with your household items as dateable characters. Suddenly, that old lampshade becomes a witty conversationalist, the toaster a charmingly quirky romantic interest, and the potted plant a surprisingly deep and thoughtful companion. This innovative concept takes the familiar dating sim formula and injects it with a healthy dose of absurdity and unexpected charm. The game features thousands of fully voiced lines, expertly delivered by a talented cast including notable voice actors such as Benn Star (Final Fantasy XVI) and Erica Lindbeck (Persona 5 Royal and Persona 5 Strikers), bringing each object to life with unique personalities and backstories.

A Cast of Thousands (Literally!)

The sheer number of characters available to date in Date Everything! is staggering. The developers have clearly embraced the boundless potential of their premise, creating hundreds of unique personalities, each with their own intricate storylines, quirks, and romantic possibilities. From the stoic and reliable refrigerator to the flamboyant and dramatic vacuum cleaner, no object is left untouched by the game’s whimsical charm. Each character boasts a distinct personality, ensuring a varied and engaging experience. Some characters are easy to connect with, offering straightforward conversations and clear romantic pathways, while others are more enigmatic, requiring more effort and insight to unlock their affections.

Gameplay and Story: Beyond the Quirks

Beyond the novelty of dating inanimate objects, Date Everything! boasts a surprisingly well-developed narrative. The game establishes a compelling backstory for the player character, a recent victim of corporate downsizing, replaced by AI, adding a surprisingly poignant layer to the seemingly absurd premise. This unexpected narrative depth is further enriched by emails and messages from former colleagues and friends, creating a nuanced and engaging experience that extends beyond the simple act of wooing household items. The storyline adds a surprising level of emotional resonance, contrasting the lighthearted humor of the dating mechanics with the more serious themes of job displacement and the anxieties of modern life.

Navigating the World (and its Inhabitants)

While the core concept of Date Everything! is undeniably inventive and entertaining, the sheer scale of the game can sometimes feel overwhelming. The massive number of characters, combined with the game’s user interface (UI), can present a significant challenge for players. The UI, while functional, could benefit from some streamlining to improve navigation and ease the overall experience. Navigating the vast cast of characters and their individual storylines can be initially daunting, requiring some time and effort to get acquainted with the game’s structure and features. Occasional bugs, a common problem in early-access titles, can also disrupt the overall gameplay, though the developers are actively working on addressing these issues.

Visuals, Sound, and Technical Aspects

Date Everything! employs a vibrant and colorful art style, characterized by expressive cartoonish visuals that effectively capture the quirky personalities of the characters. The game’s visuals are appealing and contribute significantly to its overall lighthearted atmosphere. Complementing the visuals is a captivating soundtrack featuring four hours of original music for each character, each with a theme that reflects their unique personality and backstory. This level of musical detail enhances the immersive quality of the game, further enriching the overall experience. However, the game’s 64-bit requirement might exclude players using older systems, a limitation that should be considered.

The Verdict: A Quirky Delight with Room for Improvement

Date Everything! is a truly unique dating simulation game that successfully delivers on its ambitious premise. The sheer scale of the game, the depth of its characters, and the surprising emotional resonance of its narrative make it a stand-out title within the dating sim genre. While the sheer volume of content can feel overwhelming at times, and occasional bugs may disrupt the experience, the game’s innovative concept, well-written characters, and engaging soundtrack make it a worthwhile experience for players who appreciate a truly unique and unconventional game.

Pros and Cons Summarized

Pros:

• Wide Variety of Characters: The sheer number of characters available to date is unprecedented in a dating sim, providing endless possibilities and replayability.
• Interactive Graphics: The colorful and expressive art style effectively conveys the unique personalities of each character, adding to the overall charm and enjoyment of the game.
• Entertaining Concept: The innovative premise of dating inanimate objects is inherently fun and engaging, offering a fresh perspective on the dating simulation genre.
• Compelling Storyline: The game’s narrative, which involves job loss and the unexpected arrival of magical glasses, adds an emotional depth that elevates the overall experience.
• High-Quality Voice Acting: The talented voice cast brings each character to life, creating a truly immersive and memorable gaming experience.

Cons:

• Overwhelming Scale: The sheer number of characters and the complexity of their individual storylines can feel overwhelming to new players.
• Occasional Bugs: The game is prone to occasional bugs, which can disrupt gameplay and detract from the overall experience.
• UI Overload: The game’s user interface could benefit from improvements to enhance navigation and overall usability.
• 64-bit Requirement: The 64-bit requirement excludes a portion of potential players using older systems.

Despite these minor shortcomings, Date Everything! remains a refreshing and captivating experience. Its unique premise, combined with its surprisingly deep storyline and engaging characters, offers a delightful and unconventional approach to the dating simulation genre. For those seeking something different and willing to embrace the absurdity, Date Everything! is definitely worth a try.